School of Non Violent Resistance עברית  לאתר בעברית

Prof. Haim Omer Message from Haim Omer
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NVR - School of Non Violent Resistance

Advanced Module Lectures Abstracts 16-18.10 to Basic Module Lectures Abstracts >>
1. Prof. Haim Omer - Coping with the anxious child: Helping parents overcome parental accommodation
"Parental accommodation" is the tendency of parents to fulfill the expectations of the anxious child that he or she will not be required to cope with situations that arouse anxiety. Accommodation may be voluntary or imposed. In both cases it is linked to an aggravation of the child's condition. Actually, parental accommodation is a strong predictor of the chances of an individual therapy for the child (by medications or CBT) – high accommodation leading to treatment failure. Our model systematically reduces parental accommodation, helping the parents to support instead of protecting the anxious child. This is the first treatment approach that allows for treating also children who are not willing to cooperate with any form of therapy for their anxiety.
2. Dan Dolberger - Parenting the Adult Dependent Child
In affluent societies worldwide, there are increasing numbers of adults who develop a dysfunctional emotional and financial dependence on their parents. This situation results from the convergence of cultural and economic factors with individual psychological vulnerabilities. Despite the variability of the causative factors, "Entitled Adult Dependence" (AED) is surprisingly homogeneous, as described by our "Dependency Trap" construct. Dependent adults often drop-out from school or work, demand money and other services, immerse themselves in virtual environments and invert the night-day cycle. The dependent adult's demands are often followed by extreme threats and acute reactions in case of parental non-compliance. In this lecture we present an NVR-based systemic intervention model for AED, that helps parents break out of this vicious circle.
3. Irit Schorr Sapir - School Refusal
The phenomenon of school refusal is gaining momentum in recent years, in some places reaching the proportions of an epidemic. Parents’ reactions vary from sermonizing and threats to pity and surrendering. In many cases the entire system is helpless in the face of the child's persistent refusal to go to school.
The 'non violent resistance' method offers a systematic treatment program to bring the child back to school.
The lecture introduces the audience with the NVR specific tools to treat school refusal: How to maintain the child's student identity; How to convey the child a clear, consistent message, without escalating or surrendering; Inserting school boundaries into the home; Including and recruiting the school staff into the treatment process; Creating a "going to school" hierarchy and a gradual exposure to the sources of anxiety; Recruiting supporters for practical help; Reconciliation moves.
4. Irit Schorr Sapir - Dealing with Behavior Problems and ADHD at School, Emphasizing the teacher-parent alliance
The lecture will focus on the parents' counseling program for parents of children with ADHD and with behavioral problem, that exhibit behavioral problem at school.
The intervention program focuses on creating a working alliance between the parent and the teacher. The alliance objectives are to reduce the child's behavioral problems at school and create a reciprocal support network for parents and teachers. The lecture will describe various tools for the forming of this alliance and for establishing cooperation between parents and the school
5. Irit Schorr Sapir - Resisting Bullying and Ostracizing: a Systemic NVR Approach.
The lecture will focus on tools and methods to create a solid framework to deal with bullying at school. A special emphasis will be given to the phenomena of ostracizing at school, and ways to break it by creating a support network involving teachers, parents and friends.
6. Prof. Haim Omer - The support network: how to improve it
Support is absolutely crucial for NVR. The readiness and ability of therapists to invest in the support network is often the key to an effective treatment. In the course of the years we have seen that a proactive and systematic approach to the recruitment and maintenance of the support network guarantees higher support levels. I shall describe a number of principles and techniques for maximizing the positive involvement of school personnel and community agencies. I will also deal with issues of parental resistance to the mobilization of a support network.
7. Tal Fisher - Routine Vigilant Care
The methods of NVR and The New Authority were developed mainly with problematic children. The adaptation of the approach to a normative population requires some modifications. In order to ascertain what are the needs and practices of parents from a normative population, we performed 36 interviews. A detailed analysis of the interviews gave us valuable information about the ways parents normally exercise vigilant care. The interviews also informed us about the needs that "normal" parents experience in their give and take with their growing children. Based on this information we have developed guidelines on how to help parents cope with routine and not so routine problems in the spirit of NVR and the New Authority. In particular, we shall present ways of increasing contact points with the child, helping parents improve their natural support networks and have productive conversations with the child.
8. Iris Shachar-Lavie - Implementing Vigilant care in the Digital World
The introduction of the Internet and other technologies into the family life has influenced the parent-child relationship in various ways. Questions regarding parental involvement and supervision on children’s media life, challenges both parents and therapists. The concept of "Vigilant Care" can offer us a new way to examine some of the challenges parents face nowadays as addressing Internet activity is becoming a relevant issue in almost every family's life. Therapists would benefit from understanding the family dynamics regarding computer and Internet use as well as the child's "digital identity". In addition to these aspects, the workshop will focus on an intervention program for parents who feel their children are “Internet addicts”. The main tools will be described alongside examples from a pilot study and therapeutic vignettes.
9. Naama Gershy - Can we have the Session without the Father?" - Mobilizing Fathers to Therapy, Presence and vigilant care
The present lecture will focus on the presence of fathers in parental counseling in NVR. In the past years of working with parents we learned that the fathers’ recruitment and involvement in therapy is a crucial aspect in enhancing the parental presence and authority at home and that unsuccessful fathers’ recruitment raises the risk for treatment failures and early dropouts. Yet, therapists are often unaware of these challenges and tend to place too much or too little emphasis on the fathers’ involvement and on the relationship between the parents. In the present lecture we will present the guidelines we established for successful father involvement in therapy. We will learn about the major challenges in working with fathers in NVR and analyze different types of fathers’ involvement and fathers’ resistance. We will also learn clinical tools that could help therapists to cope with ambivalent fathers, fathers with low presence at home, abusive fathers and cases of severe parental dispute.
10. Dr. Ifat Lavi Levavi - Vigilant Care in Medical Conditions – Diabetes
Children's non compliance to medical treatment is a new challenge to the vigilant care model. Working with parents of children who are non- compliant to medical treatment of diabetes is a new adaptation of the model that is being developed nowadays. The lecture will present this adaptation and clinical vignettes.
International Training

KHT-Kinderhaus Thalwil

Systemisches Institut Augsburg

NVR Italia



Leren over Leven Opleidingsinstituut



IF Weinheim

Centrum voor Geweldloos Verzet Vlaanderen

MoleMann Mental Health

Institut für Kind, Jugend und Familie